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Posts Tagged ‘goals

2017.

What a year it has been. I’m already getting chills just thinking about this year. <Deep Breath> What a year, indeed.

I started this year by creating a Vision Board to chart out my biggest goals. Goals that at the time were just mere thoughts, ideas, hopes, prayers really. My three main goals were: Buy a house, Start a business, and Find a Rock Solid Love. Supporting goals around those ideas included: Conquering my addictions, Improving my self-esteem, Seeing beyond the limits of my ego, being fearless, Finishing What I Start, and last, but certainly not least, Healing.

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I had no real expectations.

I knew I was going to buy a house, but the search up until that point had been long and very tedious. I had looked at so many houses, and none of them felt right. When I created my vision board I was drawn to these pictures of a home with these crisp white walls. They seemed simple and elegant, they resonated with my soul, so onto the board they went. Three weeks into the year, the day of my thirty first birthday, I walked into a house, and as I was looking around a peaceful knowing came over my soul, this was my home. I didn’t pick up on it in that moment, but later on I was looking at my vision board, when it clicked. The house, my house, was full of tall, white, and simply elegant walls. My soul knew what I wanted all along, and through my vision board, it was able to show me exactly what that was.

Across the middle of my vision board I had created a large cutout of the word Entrepreneur. Again, I didn’t really know what that looked like, or what it meant for me, but onto the board it went for life to sort it all out. This one wasn’t as easy though. I struggled trying to figure out what business was really right for me. In March I created an LLC to do some side recruiting through. Recruiting is what I know, it’s what I’m good at, so it made sense that I create a business around that. Or did it?

A friend and former colleague of mine also started recruiting for himself about the same time. Except he was really going for it. We conversed a lot about how to go about the business, the ins and outs of taxes, legalities, contracts, etc. It didn’t take long for me to notice… that I really didn’t care about my business the way that he cared about his. It didn’t motivate me. It didn’t inspire me. That was a problem. That was a big problem.

In early March, I went to a talk by Derek Loudermilk that was called “Live the Life of your Dreams: The Top 10 Ways To Earn Money Online And Travel The World”. I was very intrigued by the message in Derek’s talk. He talked about various ways to make money through blogging, speaking, pod casting, coaching, and even creating and marketing online courses. These were all things that heavily piqued my interest. I already had a blog, I was always signing up for other people’s online life courses, and to imagine myself out giving a speech somewhere someday, possibly even a Ted talk… sent chills down my spine. This was what I wanted to do, this was the life of my dreams!!

The day after going to Derek’s talk, I got a random idea to host a Vision Board Class. I didn’t know what it would look like, or who would even want to attend, but I knew the New Moon was coming up and that was the best day of the month to plant an intention, so I created a Facebook event for the April New Moon, and hoped for the best. The night of my class, I had four girlfriends that came over. As soon as I saw the group of ladies that I would have, my heart felt so full, and so right. These were all women that I respected tremendously, who were all working hard at figuring out their own goals, and whom I knew that this class could truly help within their pursuits. It was an amazing and inspiring night.

A few weeks later, I set up a call with this Derek Loudermilk character. At the end of his talk, he had passed around a sign up sheet offering a free consultation to anyone there who wanted to talk. After seeing how inspiring my vision board class was, I wanted to talk to him and get his opinion on what kind of business I should potentially create. My one hour call turned into three hours, as Derek helped me work my way through some of my own self limiting blocks and beliefs that no one else in my life had been bold enough to call me out about to my face. My ego didn’t like him… which is exactly why my soul hired him right then and there. Working with Derek was a big financial commitment though, and again, my ego wasn’t totally on board. So I postponed our first official meeting until July so I would have enough time to wrap my ego and my brain around how the hell I was actually going to pay for him.

When I moved into my house, in the back of my mind, I had this idea that I could rent part of my it out on AirBNB. I knew I didn’t want permanent roommates, but I was totally okay with temporary guests, and even welcomed the thought of playing host to out of towners. So, with two months to secure my financial stability, and make sure I could really afford the commitment I had made, I went to work! I spent June and July getting beds, sheets, towels, and more, to turn my house into a real BNB. It was a lot of work, but it felt good, it felt right, and most of all it made me feel alive.

My first meeting with Derek came mid July. He was curious why I hadn’t posted my BNB yet. It wasn’t ready, it wasn’t perfect, I didn’t have pictures, I didn’t have a system figured out, I needed more time! My perfectionism needed more time. Derek challenged my objections though and pushed me to get the house listed by August 1st. Now my perfectionism had a choice: post it as it was… which wasn’t totally perfect, or fail to meet my first goal. I wasn’t about to be a failure, so I gave in and decided it was good enough to post. I listed the house on August 1st, my first guests checked in on August 5th. I was terrified. They were 5 kids from the UK who were finishing up a stint at a Summer Camp and had 5 days to kill in St. Louis before returning home. They had never used AirBNB, and were pretty much as clueless as I was about how exactly it was going to go. So we learned together. I learned that having house rules were important. They learned that eating your hosts food is a big no no. Lol. We had fun. Within my first month on AirBNB I made enough to pay my commitment to Derek, and still had extra to cover all my utilities. Every month since I have made enough to continue to cover my coaching costs and my most of utilities as well.

Dream Count
Soul: 1   Ego: 0

AirBNB wasn’t my end game though, that was simply one branch of the tree. My vision board class was another branch. My blog a third branch. Astrology, a passion of mine that was quickly becoming very useful to me, I knew would factor into this tree as well. While we’re on passions, there is also the topic of my comedy and storytelling, where do these fit in on my tree? Ahh, those go into the speaker branch. You know that dream of giving a TED talk that sent chills down my spine after Derek’s first talk? Yes, that is an important branch indeed. What else? Hmmm… Well, what I really want is to be someone’s Derek, calling out people’s ego’s and making them see how the only thing that is limiting them… is themselves. The more I got into astrology, and understanding my own innate talents and gifts, the more I have come to accept that this is actually something that I am very good at. I can see the bigger picture very clearly, and I’m great at meeting people on their level and talking to them in a way where they instinctively know they can trust me, and know that I have their best interests at heart. Which I do, and which is why being a coach is exactly what I need to be doing.

Dream Count
Soul: 6   Ego: 0

This year I figured out my dreams, and I learned to believe in myself enough to make them happen. Which, if that isn’t the truest definition of an Entrepreneur, then I don’t know what is.

So what about that third goal, a rock solid love? Those who know me well, know that love has been a struggle for me my entire life. Not for lack of trying, and not for a lack of suitors though, no, my struggle with love has always been with my ability to love myself. Until this year, until Derek called my ego out, and showed me how my thoughts and my words shaped this entire unlovable persona that I thought I was, I never really admitted that I didn’t love myself. When in fact, I didn’t just not love myself, but my self hatred ran quite deep. This was because I had deep hurts, deep wounds, deep pain, that I had never really acknowledged. I was always quite content to just always keep pretending I was fine. I saw no value in recognizing these things. In fact, it made me angry to even think about it. Well, it made my ego angry. You see, my ego, is the perfectionist, and for it to acknowledge my own imperfection made it quite hostile. I spent many nights this year alone in my home, quite literally screaming through that anger. Digging into it, understanding it, processing it, and thankfully slowly letting it go. Little by little, as I have let my anger go, as I have learned to understand the why behind my heavy emotions, I have slowly learned to love the imperfect woman that was beneath all of that hate. I have learned to love her something quite fierce actually. She is strong. She is kind. She is wise beyond her years. She is quite simply incredible. I can say all of that without hesitation now, because she IS the rock solid love I have been so desperately looking for.

Let’s go back to those vision board goals again: Buy a house (I  moved into my house on 3/17), Start a business (Achieved on 4/7, and again on 8/1, and again on 12/4.. and again and again and again), and Find a Rock Solid Love (All year long baby). Supporting goals around those ideas included: Conquering my addictions (I was sober 1/1 – 5/4, drank like a fish in May, realized why I got sober again by June, and have only let myself have wine ever since), Improving my self-esteem (Self love all day), Seeing beyond the limits of my ego (thank you Derek), being fearless (DOING ALL OF THIS REQUIRED ME TO BE MORE FEARLESS THAN I HAVE EVER KNOWN), Finishing What I Start (AirBNB), and last, but certainly not least, Healing (Working through anger, working through pain, coming out full of self love on the other side).

Wow.

2017… you changed my life.

It all started with a vision, a prayer, a hope. That is really all you ever really need. The Universe will always conspire to take care of the rest. 🙂

Sending you all so much love and light, as always,

– Christine

P.S. If you are in the St. Louis area, join me Sunday December 17th from 2-5 PM for my next vision board class! Come plant YOUR dream seeds for 2018!!

 

 

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Last night marked the beginning of what I can feel is going to be an incredible journey for my life.

I hosted a Vision Board class in my home last night. For those not familiar, a vision board can be many things, but it’s purpose is to create a concrete visual of the goals, dreams, and energies that you want to attract in your life. When we have something with those things on it, where we can look at it everyday, and remain focused on what it is that we truly want in our lives, it adds to the power and momentum which is required to bring those things to fruition in our lives.

On a whim, a month or so ago, I decided that I wanted to do a vision board class. I honestly didn’t know what to expect, or how it was going to shape up, but I knew that the New Moon brings the perfect energy for manifesting goals and intentions, so I set the class for the next New Moon, created a Facebook event, invited everyone I knew, and waited to see what happened.

As time drew closer I started researching the energy of this specific New Moon, which was in Taurus. Reading about the patient, grounded energy that Taurus brings, and how it can help us to figure out where we really want to focus our time and attention in life, I knew that the class was going to have all of the energy and exact vibes that I was looking for it to create, both for myself, and for others. It truly all came together very nicely.

Teaching the class last night taught me two things about myself: 1) While I have resisted following in my mother’s footsteps of teaching thus far in my life, there IS in fact an inner kindergarten teacher inside of me who absolutely loves to create fun, inspirational, and crafty learning experiences for people. And 2) There is totally an inner guru inside of me who loves explaining the energy currents, leading meditations, and inspiring people to think outside the box.

I’ll be honest, I have so many ideas and dreams about what I want to do in this life, and lately I have been feeling a bit lost as to what it is I TRULY want to do. What is my core mission? What do I want to focus on? I have been asking myself those questions for the past few weeks trying to figure that out. The answer I have been getting is that I want to inspire people. Which, is great, but what does that mean? What does that look like?

Last night I learned what that looks like. It looks like me directing a group of very smart, inspired, forward thinking women on how to work with the current energies of universe in order to best visualize and set their focus and intentions for the month ahead. My strengths lie in three key areas: 1) Socializing/Networking 2) Planning/Organizing and 3) Outside the Box Thinking. When you combine all of those with the goal of wanting to inspire people… you get one bad ass vision board class teacher. 🙂

I definitely don’t think that vision boarding is where this stops either. It is a great class, and I will definitely be doing it again, probably on a monthly basis actually. However, what last night really showed me is that I am on exactly the right track with what I want to do with my life. I felt alive last night in the best way possible. Now all I want is to help everyone else in the world feel that same way, which is exactly what I was put here to do.

I. Can. Not. Wait!!!!

Here are some of the finished products of last night:

Visions

Stay blessed all,

– Christine

 

 

writing-goals

Here we are, 97 days into 2017, and I have completed 50 blogs for the year up to this point. That is certainly less than I had originally planned, given my ‘365 Days of Writing’ project was all about forcing myself to write everyday, however, it is a heck of a lot more blogs than I have ever posted before, so I’m not going to beat myself up about it too much. If it takes me 2 years to complete ‘365 Days of Writing’ then so be it. I do have these grand plans in my mind that I will one day sit down and play catch up, writing several blogs in a day, to the point where I am eventually back on track. Given my success rate of posting daily is at 50% though, I do not foresee this grand scheme to get myself back on track ever really coming to fruition.

I digress.

I am thankful to all of you who have joined me on this journey thus far, and who continue to read and offer words of encouragement along the way.

I have always known that I like to write. Forcing myself to do so in a more regulated manner has shown me that it is entirely possible for me to write and maintain a blog presence. While writing everyday is certainly a challenge, writing a few times a week is most certainly doable.

I am looking forward to where this journey takes me.

Have a good weekend all!

– Christine

 

Today is my birthday. Maybe it’s the week I’ve had, but I can’t remember a birthday that I have been less enthusiastic about. Thirty one. No glitz. No glamour. It’s just an age now. That part I’m okay with. I’m not dismayed by age. I am quite intrigued by the thirties and excited for how they will see me grow.

I think my disappointment with this year comes on the slight feeling of having failed myself over the past year. You see, since my birthday is in January, every year I set a goal for myself of something I want to accomplish that year. In the years leading up to thirty it seemed my ability to achieve said goal always came in the final hours. I’m a procrastinator by nature, so the pressure to make something happen doesn’t really hit hard until the deadline is fast approaching.

My goal for myself for thirty was to buy a house or property. Anyone that knows me, knows I’ve been working hard towards this goal this past year. I even moved in with my parents mid year in order to meet the monetary goal I knew was truly necessary to be serious about buying a place. Many people also know that over the past two months I’ve put several offers on places, even had one accepted only to fall through shortly after. To say it’s been challenging would be an understatement. I know internally I became more frantic about buying a place in December only because I knew my birthday was rapidly approaching and the thought of failing myself seemed out of the question. The Universe seems determine to not let me achieve this one.

However today, as I look back at the year that I have had, the challenges that I have faced, and the growth that I have achieved over the past 12 months, I see that my failure was not in the fact that I didn’t buy a property this year. No, my failure lies in the goal that I set for myself. You see my goal this year was wrong from the start. Before I could achieve the things that I want in life, I needed to get real about the things that were holding me back in life. That’s what this year taught me.. that in order to move forward, you must first admit to what is holding you back. What was holding me back? My ability to take care of myself… my ability to be healthy… physically and mentally.

Healthy means many things. For me, this past year it has meant finding an exercise that I enjoy, and pushing myself to do it everyday. I love biking. This year my love for biking saved me from my depression. It got me outside on days when I didn’t want to get out of bed. It got me in the heart of nature where I could connect back to my soul. It made me feel alive again. Not to mention it helped me lose 50lbs.

I got my eating under control. One night as I was staring down at the bottom of a bag of donuts, eating my pain away, I stopped and I asked myself… what emotion are you eating instead of feeling right now? That was the first night I admitted to myself that I was using eating to hide from my real pain. Once I admitted that to myself, it became a lot harder to sit and eat a whole bag of donuts and feel okay about it.

I should also mention Juice Plus+ in there, but only because I know it made my struggle against food so easy. When I started taking Juice Plus+ and flooding my body with good things, suddenly I didn’t crave sweets anymore. I craved salads. I don’t care how many emotions I can conquer, for me to actually crave healthy food… that is a miracle. Juice Plus+ was my easy button for nutrition, both the capsules and shakes, made getting nutritious food in my body so easy, and for one less struggle that was not so much a struggle… I am so thankful.

Then came sobriety. This was the hard one. This was the truth I wrestled with all year pretending it wasn’t really necessary. Pretending it wasn’t impacting my life negatively. You see alcohol wasn’t affecting my life to a point where it impacted my job, or my ability to function. Drinking wasn’t even something I felt the need to do every week. How could it be a problem if I wasn’t even drinking that much?? How could social drinking be so bad??

It was bad though. It was bad on the nights when I drank and then I let myself text an ex boyfriend. It was bad when I drunkenly drove myself home. It was bad when I didn’t get up and go to meditation class, or go bike, or go do the things that I truly wanted to be doing. Drinking took away my own power from myself.

I guess that’s what this year taught me really. It taught me that the only thing that can get in my way… is myself. It taught me that the only person that can hold me back from greatness… is me. It taught me, that even when I want to pretend to that I can make short cuts work out… that I can’t, and that I’m only postponing my own happiness by trying. This year showed me the value of listening to myself.

That may not be the goal I set out with… but it was the goal that I needed. As I sit here today and think about that… I could not be more grateful to life for stepping in to rearrange my goal this year to something far more valuable than buying a house.

Funny how if the Universe had let me get a property this past year… perhaps I would have missed the real value in that realization of real lesson I was meant to learn through all this. I love when the universe hands you beautiful moments like that. (Although, now that I’ve realized it, we can go ahead and make one of the properties I’m viewing today work out, right??) :p

Thirty was a beautiful year. It was a year of tremendous growth and learning. It was a year that led me closer to who I really am. With that, I have to say I can’t wait for what 31 has in store. I am set up for greatness. I am set up to make my dreams come true. I cannot wait to see where the Universe takes me a year from now… and what wonderfully hard lesson I will finally come to learn before I turn 32. 🙂

Cheers to goals, new directions… and life! ❤

– Christine

Over the past year I have become aware that my drinking has become more problematic in my life than it has been fun. Too many nights I have driven knowing full well I was not in the most sound state to do so. That, above anything else, has been the driving reason for me to drastically change my behavior and what I deem acceptable in life.

With that, I am proud to announce that I am no longer drinking. Many of those close to me know that has been a goal of mine for some time now, but not a goal I was all that committed to. I was committed to it on mornings when I was hung over and full of regret, but when Friday evening came around I was all too quick to forget my reasons for abstaining.

As someone who struggles with self control in life on a regular basis, drinking only served to be my escape to let go of any tiny bit of self control that I was able to have. I have set many goals for myself over the past year, and in my look back at why some of those goals never came to fruition, drinking was usually the main, if not the only, reason for it.

I have tried the method of limiting myself to only having two drinks when I go out, and at times that has worked just fine. However, I question what the point of even having two drinks is, when those two drink would still sometimes led to 3… or 4… or more.

What ultimately led to my commitment to not drink at all period, was the fact that it’s not really even fun to me anymore… under any circumstance. I drink, I maybe get a little more loosey goosey than I normally would be, but I’m already a pretty outgoing person, so alcohol only serves to increase the volume of voice really. When I really think about what it is doing for me, I see that it is just making me more ego driven, while abandoning all of the proactive decision making that I’ve striven so hard to learn this year. Which at this point, is exactly the opposite of what I want out of my life.

Not to mention alcoholism runs in my family, very heavily. So while some people can control themselves while drinking and not take it too far… for me that’s a very hard thing to do. One taste and I just want more.

I by no means want to judge anyone who chooses to drink, that is everyone’s own prerogative. However, I would like to encourage everyone to think about the reasons why you like to drink. Is it because it’s fun? Is it because it takes the edge off after a crappy day at work? Is it because that’s just what you’ve always done? What is it that you get out of drinking?

Think about all the goals that you want to accomplish in life, and ask yourself if drinking is in anyway hampering those goals? If the answer is yes, I encourage you to start thinking about how cutting back or quitting drinking might help you get further with certain goals this coming year. Our society is so entrenched in drinking being a normal thing that everyone does, but I’ve started to see that that perception is perhaps one that is perpetrated by society to in fact keep us down. I personally see no real benefits to drinking, physically or mentally, so why is it that it’s become such a staple for so many people and events?

Can you imagine a society that is so well adjusted that we don’t ever need to drink to avoid our true reality? Seems like a better place to live to me. Getting there is going to take a lot of big changes for people, but I think many people are ready for that change. We are already becoming a more health conscious society, so I think that will help drive the initiative a lot further over the coming years. We are also starting to be able to better recognize how we are being controlled by the bigger powers at play in the world, and I have to say, I think the normalization of drinking is a move they conspired to make so common place to keep us from rising up. I’ll leave my conspiracy theories out of it for now though, and just say that I hope everyone reading this takes a minute to think about their own drinking habits, and evaluate what it is really bringing to the table for you in your life. I’m not saying you shouldn’t ever drink, but I do think you should understand yourself enough to know why you drink. Understanding the why goes a long way to understanding if it’s something you really need in your life or not.

Your support and encouragement on my journey are much appreciated.

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Love and blessings to all,

– Christine

My New Years Resolution is one that will keep my accountable to the one thing that I know for certain that my soul should be doing: writing. That’s right, I present to you my accountability structure for 2017, which is 365 Days of Writing. Each day will have a new topic, some topics might make more than one appearance, there are no rules basically, other than that I WRITE everyday. I have struggled with forcing myself to actually write for too long now, so this is my attempt to push past my perfectionism, push past my inability to express myself, and just DO IT. (Yes, I’m a Nike commercial now.)

For my first post, I want to reflect on 2016… The year of learning. Many people had a crappy 2016, for a multitude of reasons. My year had its ups and downs, but yeah, overall I would say it kind of sucked. However, as I was riding through the park on my bike yesterday looking at all the dead trees… I realized that 2016 was just a winter year. It was a year of cold harsh realities and death of life as we knew it. If you are lucky, perhaps you learned something very valuable. Dark times force us into change and growth, so that’s an upside.

Me? I learned a lot in 2016. I learned about patience, which has opened my eyes and changed my entire approach to life. No longer am I in a rush to get everything or have everything that I know I should have. Now I am content enjoying my journey and sitting back to wait and see what the universe has in store. Which is another thing I learned this year. I mean I had heard it before, I thought I understood it, but it wasn’t until I had the patience to sit back and observe it, that I truly understood the fact that we do really create our own reality and our own universe. Our beliefs create our world. If you believe you can, you will, if you believe you can’t, you won’t.

Without trying to be your motivational pep talk for the New Year, I would like to challenge everyone to think about your own beliefs. Think about the dreams and goals that you have. What do you believe is standing in your way of achieving those dreams? Now banish those beliefs… because I have news for you: they aren’t real. Believing in yourself, and your ability to do anything or achieve anything, truly believing it, is the only battle there is. Once you believe you can, you will. However, if you sit in wishy washy confused state not exactly sure of what you want or what you believe… then there you will sit.

I spent most of 2016 in that wishy washy state. I think a lot of us did, and maybe still are even. However, what I learned during this shitty year of confusion is that I was confused because what I want, what I know, and what I believe… are all changing. Change can be scary. Change at the level that shakes you to the core of who you are as a person… feels like death. I can only speak for myself, but I spent most of the latter part of 2016 aware that my life was about to significantly change. Despite the fact that I spent most of 2015 preaching about “Be The Change You Wish To See In The World”, I had not actually prepared myself for such change, and so when the time came I was just stuck in a confused sad state, banging my head against the wall trying to figure out where I was going wrong. Until yesterday when I was riding and it suddenly became very clear to me that without Winter there would be no Spring, without death there would not be new life, and without discomfort there would not be change.

2016 was our discomfort… 2017 is our time for change…. and with that… I could not be more excited for the New Year.

Blessings to all, and thanks for reading.

– Christine